The Raw Truth: Crystal

The Real Raw truth? I’m 28 with no parents. I lost my dad when I was 19 from pneumonia and lost my mom when i was 25 from cancer.
It’s not easy living a life without parents. I didn’t only loose my parents- I lost who i was, everything i’ve ever known, and felt very alone. I was able to start finding myself after my dad passed but to only loose it again when I found out my mother was diagnosed with cancer. I remember the call like it was yesterday, I was on my lunch break. I froze. I didn’t know what to say to her. How do you comfort the most important person you know, when they tell you they have cancer. We just cried on the phone. I said, “don’t worry we will get through it, we will fight it, everything will be okay.”
All I kept thinking was – how was everything going to be okay? She had cancer and she was going to die and there was nothing I could do to help her. I was scared. She was scared. The unknown is scary.
From that day forward, I didn’t know what life would bring. I was lonely, stressed, and depressed for years. I watched my mom fight every day, while at the same time slowly watching her die. The cancer destroyed her. But I stayed strong for her, for my sister, for my nieces, and for everyone around me. People would tell me “you’re so strong”  but really all I was doing was trying to SURVIVE. I internalized everything. I kept telling myself everything was going to be okay.
The day she died was the worst day of my life. I wanted nothing more than for her to tell me she loved me and that everything was going to be okay. I was with her up until she took her last breathe. It was hard but I was so grateful I was there. I tried to comfort her as much as I could, I told her it was okay and that I would be okay.
The last three years have been a whirlwind. There have been so many emotions, obstacles and achievements. Its been a chapter of rediscovery and healing. Health and wellness became my passion. My mother was my inspiration. I wanted to take my pain and use it for good. I taught myself and started implementing the concepts – gratefulness, meditation, self love, clean eating and yoga. The mind body and soul connection is so beautiful. Becoming healthy has been so empowering. I’ve experienced such growth in all areas of my life.
Today i’m a different person. I found myself my happiness. I was lonely, stressed and  depressed for far to long. I hated life. I didn’t want to be here. I had to really look within and start being grateful. Grateful that i was alive and well. I had to remember despite the hand dealt to me, I was doing pretty good.
Our passions can be found sometimes through triumphs. We all have a choice. The same 24 hours. So I chose to make a change for the good. I went to the Institute of Integrative Nutrition to become an Integrative Health Coach. My goal is to inspire healthy living. There are many illness, through lifestyle and habit changes, that can be reversed. We have the power. And i’m here to help others discover that. I want others to see that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Our minds are powerful and in order to flourish we need  to nourish it ❤
That was the key I was missing before. I was too overwhelmed by my grief that I could not live in the light. I thought negatively about everything. I always felt so sorry for myself. It’s when I started exercising love and looking within for my own inner strength that things started to change. I found gratitude, a passion, a purpose, but most importantly I found myself. A better version of me that has a mission to inspire and empower you!
The most important thing i’ve learned throughout my journey is that life is short. Find your happiness. Follow your dreams. Travel. Be kind. Love deep. and always be grateful. And if there’s a place to be it’s being uncomfortable – that’s where you grow the most.
<3, Crystal

One thought on “The Raw Truth: Crystal

  1. Beautiful story of resilience Crystal. Your story resonates me with me as I too wrestled with the sudden death of my dad (37) when I was 10. I felt my spirit break, and a deeper wedge formed between my mind and body at the emotional loss of my mom who was grief stricken and became an alcoholic to cope. I look forward to sharing with you my story of digging my way out from bulimia (my attempt to fill the emptiness) and hearing more of yours! You are the light.


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